Dear Steady Shot,

We used to be such great friends. Oh how I loved getting to level 62 on my hunters so I could get you. Oh how excited I was. I loved weaving you between my Auto Shots so much. I dedicated instructional videos to you. I told people how fun you were. I gave you a special spot on my action bar. We had matching BFF necklaces. I carved a heart and “Pike + Steady Shot” into my resident resto druid. I’d tell people that I wished I could quit you, but I didn’t mean it of course, for how could we ever part?

It was a match made in heaven; the world was our burrito.

Then you decided to unlink yourself from Auto Shot, and it was good for DPS. But it came at a terrible cost. Suddenly all you cared about was being spammed. Suddenly that was all you wanted, and suddenly I just couldn’t press you fast enough.

And suddenly we weren’t friends anymore.

I pondered all my options, but none of them were really satisfactory. I could respec into something different that would allow me to use other, more welcoming shots, but my pets love being all strong and competitive and I couldn’t bring myself to take that away from them. I could play my lowbie hunters that didn’t have Steady Shot yet. And, actually, I have been doing just that. But then I miss Heroics and Raids so I come back to you, Steady Shot.

But then I realize that you stopped making Heroics and Raids fun a long time ago.

Well Steady Shot, it’s been a long ride, but it’s just not working out. You’re bein’ nerfed, and you will no longer be a key I have to unthinkingly pound. I caught up with an old friend lately. His name is Arcane Shot. He took me out to dinner the other night in Dalaran. He’s romantic and funny and you, Steady Shot, are just going to have to be his backup because it’s over between us.

No hard feelings; we simply had separate goals. I’ll cherish the good times, and remember– we’ll always have Kara.

Sincerely, Pike

31 Responses to “Dear John. I mean Steady Shot.”
  1. Adrenis says:

    Haha, that was great =D

  2. Mister Adequate says:

    Arcane shot? Seriously? You like that jerk? After what he did to Blessing of Wisdom I didn’t think he’d get another chance with anyone. Just… be careful, okay?

  3. Jong says:

    ” He took me out to dinner the other night in Dalaran. He’s romantic and funny and you, Steady Shot, are just going to have to be his backup because it’s over between us.”

    ouch. that sounded too familiar in a really painful way.

  4. Pike says:

    “Arcane shot? Seriously? You like that jerk? After what he did to Blessing of Wisdom I didn’t think he’d get another chance with anyone. Just… be careful, okay?”

    Best comment that has been posted here.

    “ouch. that sounded too familiar in a really painful way.”

    /hugs <3

  5. Steady shot. He thought he was doing the right thing- unlinking himself from his job, i mean- auto shot, so he could be around more. but he just got needy, and then the bills started coming. Arcane at least packs a punch, but nothing lingers quite like Serpent Sting. He sticks around and only needs a little prodding every now and then to do his job. Poor Serpent Sting- always your ducky and never your Blane.

  6. Klinderas says:

    But what about that Kill Shot?

    When the time is right, he’s does a better job than anyone out there!
    Plus, he’s close friends with Cobra Strikes, just like Arcane shot!
    And since he’s been doing his cardio, he comes back faster!

    I wouldn’t push him out of it either.

  7. Tyberiuss says:

    Make Arcane wear protection. You don’t know where he’s been.

  8. krizzlybear says:

    Poor distracting shot. sitting in the corner with his awkward braces and mushroom cut.

  9. Althoran says:

    Hilarious – ah Pike always a good read :) . What are you going to do to that poor resto druid?

  10. Faulsey says:

    “You’re bein’ nerfed, and you will no longer be a key I have to unthinkingly pound.”

    And Steady Shot is the one in the wrong here?

    I think this is a clear case of domestic abuse, Pike! How could you?

  11. Davlin says:

    That was awesome. I showed all of my friends at work. It was just hilarious. /applaud

  12. Drotara says:

    Don’t think your Weird Al references are lost on me Pike! :)

    “Aw, we ate together, we bathed together
    We even shared the same piece of mint-flavored dental floss.”

  13. Mister Adequate says:

    And thus Pike did began the meme of anthropomorphizing WoW skills.

    (I hope)

  14. Watermist says:

    Ah, beware! If the Blizzard hears of the hunter community’s new love of Arcane Shot… I shudder to think what would happen.

    On the other hand, Arcane Shot really is a gentleman. ;)

  15. eresin says:

    lawl indeed :D
    /bravo

  16. Noobiewan says:

    lol, carved into a resto druid. that’ll be difficult to get off without seeing the tree doc.

  17. Autumnn says:

    LoL great post! Just did a test on the PTR. Seems if Steady hangs out with Serpent and Arcane they do some pretty good things. You know how guys are, always wantin’ to hang out with their buddies.

  18. Tinain says:

    I loved it !

    @Mister Adequate
    Blessing of Might was the strongest, you cannot blame Arcane Shot for letting Wisdom down.

  19. Ralowae says:

    Huzzah for getting a shot rotation again! I must admit I’m already using Arcane in my rotation… so far noone has asked me why I’m having to drink every pull… yet… >.>

  20. “His name is Arcane Shot. He took me out to dinner the other night in Dalaran.”

    Hey Pike, I sure hope he didn’t make you go “Dutch.” ;-)

  21. Brigwyn says:

    ok.. I couldn’t help but laugh on this one. Good job Pike. But is it really a Dear Steady Shot??? Could it not be a, “Can’t we just be friends?” moment instead?

    I’m sure we’ll still be using this standby even with it’s limited damage. what do you think?

  22. Drotara says:

    With Arcane Shot still having a cooldown I am sure Pike will still be getting fresh with Steady Shot during everything other than those 6 second intervals.

  23. Pike says:

    “All I’ve got right now is this box of one dozen starving crazed weasels.”

    “…okay I’ll take that.”

    *still has that whole song memorized*

    Also, yes Brigwyn, after the patch the new BM rotation will be: Steady x2-3, Arcane, repeat, while keeping Serpent up.

  24. Wosname says:

    Girl, this is why we read you! Great post!

  25. Badger says:

    I’m sure this is probably some forbidden act of Thread Necromancy, but I had to add: “Now he’s got a great nickname: Torso Boy!”

  26. [...] finally been tuned into being a filler shot. Don’t treat him too badly, though; we may have broken up with him but he’s still a decent friend when no one else is [...]

  27. [...] the Patchwerk meters in blues with endless Steady Shot spam. Pike misses her shot weaving. She welcomes the impending Beast Master nerfs despite the fact that she never spec’d into BW/Readiness because she found it to be rather [...]

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